suitably_heroic: (dsp: fear the jacket)
[personal profile] suitably_heroic
So the whole 'teach Sparkle self-defense on Saturdays' was working out pretty well, schedule-wise, so far. He'd be in on Friday and talk through his next deployment with Mical, he'd get the training done with Sparks the next day and grab some food, and then he'd be off into the galaxy to do the job. Made a guy much happier than barricading himself in his apartment for three weeks.

"Anyway, the others know you're going to be stopping by more often," he said. "If you ever get here and I'm not here, they'll either help you out if they have the time, or they'll at least make sure you get some nerf in you before putting you on the next portal back home."

Beat.

"Try not to sass Brianna too hard if that happens, 'cause she knows more nerve strikes than I do."

[[ for the kid. ]]

Date: 2015-03-07 06:50 pm (UTC)
myownface: (Oh right.)
From: [personal profile] myownface
"It's going to take a hell of a lot of strength training to keep my scrawny ass ahead of my mouth," Sparkle noted, looking at the door with a sense of impending doom. Minor doom. A small doom, that wasn't all that doomlike, really, when compared to the reason he was doing this in the first place. "Or, like, crazy contortionist training or something."

Date: 2015-03-07 06:59 pm (UTC)
myownface: (Wary)
From: [personal profile] myownface
"You know, I actually did? And deodorant and all that stuff."

Shampoo. He'd brought shampoo. Look, Sparkle was nothing if not fastidious with how clean he was, despite all appearances.

"I'm, um, going to need them, huh?"

Ugh. Sparkle hated sweating.

Date: 2015-03-07 07:11 pm (UTC)
myownface: (Throwin' Crap.)
From: [personal profile] myownface
"I'm going to pretend I know what any of those things you just said are," Sparkle replied, just as cheerfully, "and just head over that way that you were looking just now. Sound good?"

In fairness, Sparkle probably would've said the same thing in an Earth gym, too. And probably mostly just to be difficult. 'Weights,' at least, were generally pretty easy to figure out.

Date: 2015-03-07 07:38 pm (UTC)
myownface: (O Rly?)
From: [personal profile] myownface
"I might have! I'm accident prone," Sparkle declared, stepping over to the-- seriously, they were obviously weights. "You know this."

... Less 'accident' and more 'trouble,' generally. But Sparkle was willing to stretch the definition somewhat.

Date: 2015-03-07 07:46 pm (UTC)
myownface: (Oh right.)
From: [personal profile] myownface
"I did step in a zebra once," Sparkle offered, crouching down to get a good look at the weights. Yep. Totally weighty. "I think that counts."

Also, it had been nasty. So fucking nasty.

Date: 2015-03-07 07:56 pm (UTC)
myownface: (Hmmm...)
From: [personal profile] myownface
"Yeah, but they're not actually rotting and crawling with maggots when I put them in my mouth," Sparkle countered, taking two of the weights in hand and, giving them an experimental little lift, making his way to the bench in question. "So I just, what, lay down and then...?"

Lift the weights, Spark. You lay down and lift the weights.

Date: 2015-03-07 08:29 pm (UTC)
myownface: (Fuck You and You and You and...)
From: [personal profile] myownface
"Yeah, well, you know how far behind my planet is when it comes to rocket science," Sparkle snarked, doing as he was told. Up went the weights! Shit, he was actually doing it!

... They were pushing the piddly side of puny, but look, he'd done it, and that was what counted here.

"And then, like, slowly bring them down again, right?"

Like they did in the movies. Presumably so they wouldn't smack themselves in the face, right?

Date: 2015-03-07 08:44 pm (UTC)
myownface: (Bring it)
From: [personal profile] myownface
"Well, it's either that, or I just chill out here until my arms turn to spaghetti and I break my face," Sparkle snarked right back, lowering the weights again. "How many times do you want me to do this, anyway?"

Date: 2015-03-07 09:02 pm (UTC)
myownface: (O Rly?)
From: [personal profile] myownface
To his credit, Sparkle didn't stick his tongue out at that. Mostly because he didn't trust himself to not drop a weight on his face and end up biting it off or something as he did so.

"Ten, okay. Should be easy enough."

Said the guy who had never had to hold his arms up with something in them that way. Repeatedly. Said that guy.

He was somewhere around seven when this fact started to dawn on him.

Date: 2015-03-07 09:20 pm (UTC)
myownface: (Hoodie)
From: [personal profile] myownface
Fuck soup. After he was done with this, whatever meal Sparkle asked for was going to have to be something he could drink with a straw.

"Nine... ten."

Oh god. Spark had so many regrets. He lowered the weights and tried to shake his arms out a bit, like maybe that would help somehow with the next set of reps. Maybe? Yes? Please?

Date: 2015-03-07 09:31 pm (UTC)
myownface: (ARGH)
From: [personal profile] myownface
"Never breathing again. Probably dying. If my arms fall off before I can write one last letter, can you tell my cat I said goodbye?"

See, now he was being a drama queen. If he got thirty seconds to dick around, he was going to make the best of it.

Date: 2015-03-07 09:48 pm (UTC)
myownface: (Hug My Knees)
From: [personal profile] myownface
"Aw, Velcro knows me better than that," Sparkle protested, reaching up to rub at one kind of gooey bicep, and then the other. "I mean, like, because I'd have to actually make it as far as the floor in order to die there, and I'm not leaving this spot until I have to."

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